A Minute Can Change Everything.... Metamorphosis Part 2

...I had dropped Chris Matthews in a heap on the floor only to turn around and see Jessica Matthews just a few feet from me. I was trying to figure out why she was here, when I was most certain she was still with Casey in Massachusetts. I slowly began to piece it all together when Chris looked at me like I had two heads. I was just getting a grip on reality when my phone rang, vibrating inside my pocket like a nest of angry hornets. Of course it was CC, he always seemed to pop up when I was neck deep in any kind of wild shit.....

VVR: Casey, your name was on the tip of my tongue bro.....What do ya need.

Casey: Mr. Casey isn't available right now, you will address me as The Lord or you will find me scraping your skull from my boot. Now listen and listen well whelp.....

....The call went on for a few minutes and Chris just stared in disbelief as I gestured widely arguing with "The Lord" over this point and that. Eventually I threw the phone across the room angry beyond words. I began to yell at Jessica Matthews calling her every name in the book I could think of at the time. I was mere inches from here and could see her eyes glistening with tears. In my world, in my thought process, if it were not for her and her scheming over this and that I wouldn't be the broken thing I am. I made it my mission in the few minutes since I had launched my phone across the room to make her see that her and her entire fucked up family had made me the way I am. It was then I felt Chris' restraining hand on my upper arm, he was yelling something at me over my tirade.....

Chris Matthews: What in the blue hell are you doing, what do you think you are doing......

VVR: Are you fucking stupid Matthews. I am doing what I should have done months ago....I am setting this bitch straight. If it wasn't for your God Damn sister and her sticking her nose in my shit, I might, just might be able to carry on from day to day without cracking up....But hey she is your sist.....

Chris: Vinnie, my man, there isn't anyone there. Jess isn't due in town for a couple of hours yet. Yes, the three of us need to talk, but there is no one there. I have heard of mental breaks and delusions, but I hadn't seen one until then. You thought my sister was right in front of you. You were ripping into her with damn near everything you had.....

VVR: What are you talking about Chris, she was right here. She was yelling and crying and....Where did you take her. What did you do with Casey's whore.....The Matthews' and CC have been doing their damndest to make me break, to make me question myself and everything I have been to this point, but I will have all your heads on pikes lining my walls if you are telling me I was just yelling at someone that wasn't there. This is just more of the same, "Oh it's gonna be fun to watch Vinnie crack." Casey and your psycho brother have done it in spades. I am starting to think that is why you bailed on me in the first place. "Let's see the big dumb red neck break apart at the seams".....

...I couldn't take it anymore, it felt like my head was going to split apart and something monsterous was going to jump out. I grabbed the Matthews that was real, that was in front of me by the shirt and slammed him against the wall over and over, knocking the wind out of him.....As he slid damn near lifeless down the wall, falling out of my grasp I dropped to my knees, burying my hands in my face. Unable to look at what I had done in the short time since I walked in the door of the compound, I wept uncontrollably into my hands....I had finally lost all control, I had finally cracked into a million pieces right here in the entry way of one of my good friend's palatial estate.....Oh wonderful day. Now the long line at Wal Mart or the bumper to bumper traffic on the 405 doesn't seem so bad now does it??

VVR: What in the fuck has happened to me.....Where did I go wrong???

.....I just kept repeating those words over and over screaming into my hands at some unseen demon. Maybe just maybe if I said it enough I could find the answer......Then as if on cue, like an angel from heaven a voice echoed from the open door......

?????: Vinnie, we need to talk........