[b]Lord Blackwing:[b] At long last the plan is underway. The first baby steps have been taken on the road to taking this entire God-foresaken country back to its correct place as a subject territory of Her Majesty, Queen Elizabeth II of the house of Windsor. There is a long road ahead, but it is now merely a matter of time before the Queen rules these lands again.
At Battle Grounds I, the Right Honourable Gentlemen showed the ignorant peasants of the United States of America just what they, nay, the British Empire is capable of. The might of the Empire may have dwindled of late, yet believe me when I tell you that this is just the beginning of a resurgence that will see London once more transformed in to the capital of the world. Britannia shall once again rule the waves.
The events of Battle Grounds I are the culmination of some considerable planning, and I couldn't be more delighted with how they came off. The Right Honourable Gentlemen showed the world EXACTLY what we are capable of.
I must confess to feeling a little sorry for that Knife to Know You chap. He was a victim of circumstance. The wrong man in the wrong place at the wrong time. That being said, sacrifices were going to have to be made at some juncture, so it was inevitable sooner or later. It is just a shame that someone who could have made such a competent footsoldier in the war to reconquer this God-foresaken place.
No matter. Our company was strengthened this week after the conclusion of our entente with the Canadian, Brandon Macdonald. Brandon is an excellent competitor and a wonderful addition to our group. You are all fans of his, I am sure, and I have no doubt that you are all aware of his accomplishments. I have been following his career with interest for some time, and he was always the natural choice to join our little accord. I am very much looking forward to working with him.
Hmm, what other events of note transpired on Battle Grounds? There are simply so many that I can't recall every one. Ah yes, my good friend William dished out a thrashing to AJ Reckless, also ending his career, and then to Keith Axel. He showed in true gentlemanly fashion how one wins a wrestling match the proper way.
Of couse there was the regrettable incident with Miss Rocsi. Such a terrible necessity, violence against women. It does truly break my heart to have to encourage it, but needs must eh? Finally, the one event of the night that disappointed me greatly, was my son's failure to achieve victory against a Taig, a colossal carnival sideshow and a bunch of other ragtag misfits.
I suppose I should have expected no better from him. It is constantly his wont to disappoint me. I had hoped that maybe this was his stage. His chance to prove me wrong, that all these years I have been mistaken in thinking that I have raised an incompetent ninny. Thus far, he has reverted to form. I pray that this does not continue in to next week, although I fear I may simply be getting my hopes up over nothing once again.
Either way, a solid message of intent was sent out to the Insurgency Wrestling Federation and the world at large this week. Like a cannon shot across the bow, we made our message loud and clear. The Right Honourable Gentlemen are here to take over this wretched place, and we will not rest until this goal has been achieved. We will stop for nothing or no man, and we will decimate everyone that stands in our way. Which, rather neatly, brings me on to my next subject.
It seems that ridding the Insurgency Wrestling Federation of one clown wasn't enough, and I am tasked this week with ridding it of another. There is a subtle difference between the clown I so mercilessly destroyed last week, and the one I am destined to end this time, however. Knife to Know You's reign of terror actually proved to have some amusing moments, whereas this ZIF character is about the most humourless little peasant I have ever had the misfortune to clap my eyes upon.
Take heed, ZIF, to the destruction that occurred to Knife to Know You last week, and see reflected within a prophecy of your impending doom. Do you SERIOUSLY believe that anything you say can intimidate me? But one week ago I put a psychotic clown, responsible for the deaths of several men to the ground and delivered such a crushing blow that it will be a wonder if he ever walks unaided again and you think a pathetic imbecile such as yourself can scare me?
You are the most pathetic stain on this planet that I have ever had the poor chance to encounter. However, destroying you will not be a task without its rewards. You merit special attention from myself and my associates this week for one simple reason. You, ZIF, represent every single thing that repulses me about this vile, despicable, putrid excuse for a country. You are loud, brash, indignant, disrespectful, insolent, vulgar, imbecillic and ignorant, and it would seem that those appear to be amongst your finer qualities.
I feel that before myself and my associates beat you to a bloody pulp, I should attempt to better you slightly as a person. My efforts may go unrewarded, or even unheeded, but it would not behoove my status as a gentleman if I did not do my bit for the other-whacks of this society, even if in but a matter of days their skulls may well have been caved in. It seems, based on your recent 'shoots', that you lack rudimentary grammar skills. I suppose this is indicative of the level of education available in the United States school system, but matter not, I will change that for you right now. Here is a basic lesson.
"Your British" is not a valid sentence. I do not currently, nor have I ever possessed any British and if I had, it would not be with the intention of topping anything off. I believe the word you are searching for there is 'you're' This concludes our lesson for the day. There is no need to thank me, infact, I suspect that you shan't have the opportunity before you are no longer able to verbally communicate.
I found myself unable to overlook several other glaring errors in your shoot, although these were of a more accusatorial nature than grammatical. That is, when it was possible to decipher your inane, incoherent babbling, I noticed that you spoke some fallacies, that is, to say, you made some factual errors.
You seem to be labouring under the misapprehension that, as you so DELICATELY put it, I have been 'dissing' your 'crew.' You also dare to claim that I have run your name in to the dirt. I daresay by now, given all that I have said above, that this is true. However, at the time, it was far from the case. In fact, I would say, that at the time you made these baseless allegations, I had never even heard your name mentioned before in my entire life, let alone cared a tinker's cuss to besmirch your honour.
It would be physically impossible for me to devote less of my cognitive capacity to you or your reputation, let alone that of your 'crew,' and to suggest otherwise is further characteristic of the arrogance typical of your people. It only serves to further prove to me the need to go ahead with my scheme to wrest control of these very United States, that you all may receive a more rounded education and become better gentlemen, like myself.
Would you look at that, it seems that I have begun to digress. Allow me to make this very simple for you, ZIF. I will say it in plain English so that even your monkey brain can understand it. At Battle Grounds II, the Right Honourable Gentlemen will end your miserable, wretched excuse for a career, just like we did last week, with that abysmal clown, and like we nearly did with that dago bimbo Loca Rocsi too. If you are very lucky we may even end the career of your beloved Alison Williams too. That syphillis ridden whore can accompany you during your long, long recovery period.
I do so enjoy being wicked...
Subject: Taking Care of Business Part II 
Sun Mar 20, 2011 10:09 pm
