Don't worry. We'll have fun

Jason Hawk.
Night Beautiful.

I kiss Kat and she then rests her head on my chest. I look down at her. Man, she is beautiful. Her long dark hair hair, that stunnishing smile, those beautiful blue eyes. I could go on forever talking about how beautiful she is. Not only was she beautiful. She could also be the sexiest girl you ever could lay your eyes and at the same time she is just the cutest thing ever. Words don't even justify her beauty. I feel her hug me tighter as she lets out a little moan. I chuckle and I can see her smile. She kisses my chest a few times. I am not gonna lie. I like this. She then looks up at me.

Katrina Costick.
Go to sleep Jason. I don't want you to have another one of those sleepless nights.

I nod.

Jason Hawk.
Don't worry. It won't happen tonight.

Kat smiles though I could see that she didn't believe me.

Katrina Costick.
You say that every night but you still end up sitting up until 4 or 5 AM. I am serious Jason. Get some sleep.

Jason Hawk.
It is just difficult. The amount of pain in my leg is just to great.

That was a lie. It was not the leg that kept me up all night. The leg was fine. I don't think she would like the real reason why I was sitting up all night.

Katrina Costick.
Aww.. Will it help if I kiss on it?

Jason Hawk.
Yes!

Kat winks at me then disappears under the cover. I laugh. I like how she was able to make my laugh and smile. I would say that it is one of the most important part of a relationship. Kat is just great. Wow.. wait.. that is not my leg! I shouldn't complain. I like this too.

Katrina Costick.
K done!

Wait what?

Jason Hawk.
But I am not

Katrina Costick.
You got one literally 15 minutes ago.

Jason Hawk.
But still

Kat smirks and makes her way out from under the covers. She put her arms around my neck and kissed my cheek.

Jason Hawk.
Wait.. No! No! Don't do that! Eww...

I said as she kept kissing me all around my face. Kat just laughed.

Jason Hawk
Seriously! Stop that! It is disgusting!

Katrina Costick.
Aw come on Jason. You are no fun tonight.

But that is disgusting? Right? Actually. I have no idea. I just always figured that kissing after a blow job would be disgusting.

Jason Hawk.
Its cause my leg still hurts

Katrina Costick.
But I just kissed on it. Everything is suppose to be K now

Jason Hawk.
But it is not

Katrina Costick.
I guess that means we both have to go sad to bed

I laugh and kiss Kat.

Katrina Costick.
Not so disgusting now is it?

Jason Hawk.
It is OK since it is you.

Kat smils.

Katrina Costick.
I am getting sleepy. Wanna actually go to sleep this time?

Jason Hawk.
Yeah. Night.

Katrina Costick.
Love you.

Jason Hawk.
Love you too.

And soon Kat was fast asleep. What a girl, just so perfect. I can't even describe it. But there is just one thing. One tiny little thing. Something that really shouldn't be bothering me. But it still does. Something that I can't get out of my head. Something that I doubt that I will ever get over. Something that I am really afraid of telling Kat. For different reasons. It could hurt her. It could upset her. She could maybe even leave me. The sad part is that it is not even something about Kat. Kat has done nothing wrong. Kat is fantastic. Kat is just everything I want in a girl. I need some air. I get out of the bed. I put on a pair of jeans and a shirt. A Jason Hawk shirt. Shamelessly promoting my own merchendise? Why not. I get out of the building and into my car.

As I drive down the road that song comes on again. It always reminds me of it. Reminds me of what I am longing for. It makes me sad. I know that I can never have it. It reminds me of something that was mine but was so brutally taken away from me. The song cuts to the chorus

What a wonderful life.
For as long as you been at my side.
And I want you to know.
I loved you so.

I feel a tear run down my cheek. I look over at the red roses on the passanger seat. Her favorite. I the swallow the sadness and concentrate on the road again. I drive for a while before I make it to my destination. I stop the car and get out. I take a pack of Prince Light out my pocket and I let a cigarette slide down into my hand. I light it up and take a drag. I stand there at my car for a little while. I stand there completely frozen in fear. No matter how I twist and turn this I can't find no way to make it any easier or less scary. I feel the exact same way every time I stand here. Nervous, scared and sad. But still I keep coming back. I have to. I need it. I finish my cigarette and throw it away. I open the car door and I take out the roses. I slowly walk towards the gate. I look up at the sign.

San Diego Graveyard
May you forever rest in piece

I walk in. I walked down the road looking around at all the graves. Joe Robson, Bender Lajoie, Melissa Williams, Denise Hilton. I didn't know any of these people. I move on. I knew exactly where I was going. I see a man walking towards me. It was just the undertaker. He looks up and smiles at me. He must know exactly what I am going through. He must see a lot of people going through the same thing. I just nod back at him and continued on down the road. I start to think about Kat again. How she somehow is involved with all of this. She kind of started it all. Sometimes I think that none of this would have ever happened if it wasn't for Kat. She started something great. She didn't know it would end like this. Even she was sad on that day. She was crying with the rest of us at the funeral. She was also there for me afterwards. I think that is where I realized my love for her. I love her. More than anything. But still. She just wasn't.. I look at the tombstone in front of me.

Rachel Hawk
Beloved wife, daughter and sister
What a wonderful life for as long as you been at my side.
Rest In Peace

Kat just wasn't Rachel and the problems is that I am still madly in love with Rachel. She was my wife! She was the mother of my child! She was everything I ever wanted. And now she was gone. Never to come back. Not only did I lose her. I look at the little grave next to Rachel's.

Jake Hawk
Beloved son
Rest In Peace

I lost my son too! I lost him before I even had him! Rachel died before he was born. I have never even seen my own son. I can feel the sadness start to tear me apart inside. I fall down to my knees as I feel tears run down my cheeks. I miss her so much. I placed the roses on her grave. Then I just sat there in silence.

Jason Hawk.


Suddenly I was blinded by a bright white flashing light. I covered my eyes and tried to see what was going on. All I could see was the white light. Shining so bright. I back up a few feet to escape the blinding light. As I back away I start to see a figure. It is a female figure. Suddenly gold shines from the light. It is a halo. Angel wings than appear as the light slowly starts to fade out. The figure hovers down and sits on top of the tombstone. The light fades out enough so I can see again. I remove my hand from covering my eyes and....

Jason Hawk.
Oh my god...

I look at the angel sitting on the tombstone. It is Rachel! More beautiful than ever. Never have I ever seen such beauty. The perfect blue eyes, the red hair, the smile, her stomach was flat again. For someone who was pregnant not all that long ago she looks great. And look at that! She is even showing some skin. I like that.

Rachel Hawk.
Miss me?

I was speechless. I opened my mouth but nothing came out. I just nodded. Rachel smiles at me and walks towards me. She grabs my hand and helps me back to my feet. I just stand there looking at her. My mind has been blown to pieces and I have no idea whatsoever how to react. So all I did was standing there. Starring at her like an idiot. DO SOMETHING YOU ASSHOLE! She smiled again and put her arms around my neck and I could feel her press her head against my chest. I hugged her back. I held her closer into me then ever before. I could feel the tears of joy run down my cheeks.

Jason Hawk.
I..

Rachel Hawk.
Don't say anything. Just stand here with me.

And there we stood. The stars were shinning bright and the full moan was out.

Jason Hawk.
I missed you so much.

I said as I grabbed her hand. We locked fingers as we just stare into each other's eyes. I feel that she is still wearing her wedding ring. I raise her hand to look at it.

Rachel Hawk.
Where is yours?

I look at my hand. I am not wearing the ring. I smile at her and grab the necklace arounnd my neck. I pull it up from under my shirt. The ring hangs on the end of it. I show it to Rachel.

Rachel Hawk.
Aww.. you still carry it around.

Jason Hawk.
Of course I do. I can't just throw something that important away. It is the last memory I have of you.

Rachel Hawk.
Really?

Jason Hawk.
No. I have boxes full of pictures of you and other stuff. But I consider this ring the most important.

Rachel Hawk.
What kind of stuff is that.

Jason Hawk.
You know.. pictures, video tapes..

Rachel Hawk.
That one sex tape we made?

She says with a smirk.

Jason Hawk.
Yes... I also have things you wrote that I never bothered to read and you know just stuff.. every single thing that reminds me of you.

Rachel Hawk.
Why do I have a feeling that you have something that is utterly disgusting, like a used tampoon?

Jason Hawk.
I threw those away....

Rachel Hawk.
Jason?

Jason Hawk.
Because I realized they were Kat's....

Rachel Hawk.
Ew....

Jason Hawk.
Yeah.... Not one of my smartest moves there. But anyways. How is heaven?

I feel that it is very important that I changed the subject.

Rachel Hawk.
It is great. It really is so perfect like it is described. But I still miss you.

Jason Hawk.
So are you all alone?

Rachel Hawk.
Oh no. My grandma is up there too. It was great to meet her again. I know few other people too.

Jason Hawk.
Cool beans.

Rachel Hawk.
There is also someone I would really like you to meet.

Jason Hawk.
Say what now?

Just as suddenly as before the bright white light came back. It transformed into a figure standing next to Rachel. They were holding hands. This figure also had a halo and angel wings but it was smaller than Rachel.

Rachel Hawk.
Jake. Say hi to daddy.

Jason Hawk.


Jake Hawk.
Hi daddy!

He runs towards me and I pick him up.

Jason Hawk.
Hai there little buddy.

Rachel Hawk.
He has been looking forward to meeting you for so long.

Jake Hawk.
I saw you on TV daddy. When I grow up. I wanna be just like you.

I laugh.

Jason Hawk.
Do you want me to teach you how to?

Jake Hawk.
Yes!

He says as he throws his arms up in the air.

Rachel Hawk.
Oh god. I can't handle two of you.

Jason Hawk.
Two of us would be awesome! And I know you would like it.

I put my arm around Rachel as I hold Jake up with the other arm. I smile. If I woke up to this every morning I would forever be a happy man.

Rachel Hawk.
Jason, do you know why we are here?

Jason Hawk.
That has never even crossed my mind.

Rachel Hawk.
We are your guardian angels. Everyone has one. We are your good side. Everything good you will ever do is because we told you to do so. You did it for us.

Jason Hawk.
Oh cool beans. Then I will never do anything bad again because I will do anything for you. Life is gonna be perfect.

I suddenly hear a laughter behind me.

???
Don't flatter yourself. You also have a sinning demon.

I turn around to see Nick Ridicule. Red horns stand out from his forhead. A long tail waves around behind him, he is wearing a red suit and his mohawk is longer then ever before.

Nick Ridicule.
And for everything bad you will ever do. It is because of me. Because I wanted you to do so. But don't hate on me to quickly. You need both. Don't deny it Jason. You know better than anyone how much shit you do.

Jason Hawk.
What are you talking about?

Nick Ridicule.
Shall we take a look at your wrestling style. You do nothing but cheat and you have been lieing to Kat about your leg for how long now?

Jason Hawk.
But people love me for my cheating.

Jake Hawk.
Yeah! Daddy is the best.

Nick Ridicule.
Jason, make your kid shut up and those people don't know any better.

Rachel Hawk.
Hey! You talk nice to our son!

Nick Ridicule.
Or what? You are going to attack me and lose your place in heaven?

Jason Hawk.
No, I will attack you!

Nick Ridicule.
I am hell. Whatever pain you can conflict won't even compare. But anyways Jason. You need both of us for a good life. We balance each other out. She makes sure that you don't become something of pure evil and I make sure that you don't become a little pussy that can't stand up for himself.

Rachel Hawk.
At least use nice language around a child.

Nick Ridicule.
Again. I am in hell. I feel fire burning me up twenty four seven and it will be so for all eternity. I don't care what I do up here and you can't change that.

Jake Hawk.
Mommy, what is a pussy?

Rachel Hawk.
Dammit Nick..

Rachel takes Jake and walks off with him. I suddenly realized how long it had been since I talked to Nick. We used to be best friends. Used to be. Though we fixed our problems but we never got that friendship back.

Jason Hawk.
Why Nick? Why did you commit that suicide?

Nick smirks.

Nick Ridicule.
I had nothing to live for. No friends, no girlfriend, no nothing. There is not more to it.

Jason Hawk.
So you just ended it all? Just like that? No trying to get any help?

Nick Ridicule.
All my bridges were burned down. It wouldn't make a difference.

Jason Hawk.
Oh.. But how did you do it? I mean, how did...

Nick Ridicule.
I hung myself. I was on an incredible high so I did it with a smile. Most have been a pretty picture. But you know Jason. We will never leave you know. We will always sit on your shoulders. Telling you what to do. You wanted Rachel back. You get me too. It is the price you pay.

Nick then smirks.

Nick Ridicule.
But don't you worry. I'll take good care of you.

Then the last thing I remember was Nick's foot connecting with my face.



I open my eyes and look at the ceiling. Ugh.. most have been a dream. Guardian angels, sinning demon, what a weird dream.

Rachel Hawk.
Who said it was a dream?

I look down on my left shoulder to see Rachel stand there.

Jason Hawk.
Wow....

I hear a voice from my right shoulder and turn my head.

Nick Ridicule.
Don't worry. We'll have fun.


................................................................................................................................................................

KAKAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!

I am back mother fuckers!!!

Man, it is gonna be great to get back into the ring. I have missed it so much. I really looking forward to this! First I am gonna kick some ass. Play around a bit and just enjoy being back! Even though you know..

My leg is rather fucked up.

I don't need the cane anymore. But I am still limping around. So yeah, it is gonna be difficult. I don't know if I am as fast as I used to. I don't know if I can fly as high as I used to be able to. I am just hoping so. But there is one thing I am sure of. I can still out think any opponent set before me. I am still smarter than 95% of those guys in the back. And no Dan Alexander is not one of those 5%. Even though he believes he is. But you know, if you just listen to him every week you will realize that he isn't. I mean just to take this week as an example.

He is gonna break me down?

I will not leave the ring the same as I entered?

Hai Corey Casey 2.0!

But seriously though. Since when has any of that ever been true? It is all empty threats. Never of that ever happens. I highly doubt that we will see any change in Stygian just because you broke his arm Dan. People don't change over shit like that.

I faced, and even beat, Corey Casey while he was at his most sick. While he was the most violent we have ever seen him. After the match nothing had changed. Yeah, I was pretty beat up and sore. But really, my views and opinion on stuff hadn't changed in the slightest. Nevermind being paranoid and about to shit myself every time I saw someone walk past me.

If The Lord couldn't do it. Why would you be able to?

Because the thing about Dan is. He can't get the job done. Yeah, he made a big impact last week, he knocked me out, he broke Stygian's arm among other stuff. But did he win his match?

no

The only thing he was suppose to do he failed at. He lost.

Also one funny thing Dan keeps talking about. How my life is so great and I have everything I want.

Jealous?

Dan, how does having a great life make me a bad wrestler? Why should I not be able to kick your ass six ways to Sunday because I have a good life? I remember when Tim Patrick said the exact same thing. Please tell me how exactly living a great fucking life makes you a bad wrestler? I didn't get all that out of nothing, you know. I made it all by working my ass off. I wrote my legacy. Every single wrestling fan in the world knows the name Jason Hawk. Every single one of them know that I am the absolute best high-flyer in the world and everyone knows that when I am at the top of my game. No one can stop me. So far in my IWF career I have been pinned once.

Brandon Macdonald managed to do that.

Which is nothing to be assemed of. Brandon is a great, great wrestler. One of the best in the world. No one can deny him that.

But anyways, back to Dan. Dan, who claims he is able to change me. To break me down so bad that it will forever change me.

I disagree. No one can do that. I have gone through some major shit in my life and I am still the same ETA I was before all that. I have seen my wife be murdered in front of my eyes and a match with Dan Alexander, who isn't much of a scary man, will give me mental and psychological scars?

I highly doubt it.

Because I believe I can win that match and I believe that there is nothing Dan can do about it. Because Dan Alexander is not a whole lot to brag about.

And that will not change come Saturday.