Subject: Neart le Cheile [vs] Johnny Cage & Farmer Dick Thu Feb 14, 2013 2:58 pm
MORTAL DICK ATTACK!
Tim Patrick
Posts : 375 Join date : 2011-03-01 Age : 38
Wrestler Stats IWF Record: 0-0-0 Alignment:
Subject: Re: Neart le Cheile [vs] Johnny Cage & Farmer Dick Sun Feb 17, 2013 8:57 pm
February 15, 2013 4:17 AM Tim Patrick's Apartment South Philadelphia, PA The scene begins in Tim Patrick's bedroom. He's passed out on a bare mattress on the floor. He's had a long week and has barely slept since losing, again, with Sean Libby at last week's Battle Grounds. In fact, he hasn't left his apartment since he got home late Monday night. His bed is surrounded by empty bottles of cheap whiskey and pizza boxes. His phone, wallet, cigarettes and ash tray sit on a tiny table next to him. His phone begins to ring. One eye opens, and slowly, his other eye does too. He sits up, reaches for the phone, and answers it in a raspy, exhausted voice.
Tim Patrick: What?
Voice on Phone: It's me.
Tim instantly recognizes the voice on the other end of the phone. It's Ian McFadden. A man from Tim Patrick's past. The leader of the Belfast Brigade of the UVF, Ulster Volunteer Force. The UVF is an illegal British Loyalist paramilitary that operates out of Northern Ireland, that fights to keep the British in power. They target members of the Irish Republican Army, that we know Tim was a member of, and their supporters.
Tim Patrick: I thought you were in prison.
Ian McFadden: I was in prison. When I got out I was sad to see that you weren't in town anymore. Each day I sat in my cell, I thought of you. I sat there thinking of new and painful ways to kill you. I sat there thinking that the only reason I was in jail was because I got caught with explosives trying to kill you. I didn't care about the other members of your unit, I just wanted your ass.
Tim Patrick: Where did you get this number?
Ian McFadden: It's interesting how it is in America. There doesn't seem to be any loyalty like there is in the United Kingdom. All I had to do was call your place of business. That ridiculous wrestling company that you work for. I called there and told them I was with the government and needed your phone number and address, or we were going to press charges on the company. The stupid little secretary was scared to death and handed over the information instantly. Tim Patrick gets to his feet, quickly.
Tim Patrick: Where are you, Ian?
Ian McFadden: I'm in the apartment below you. It's a shame that your drug addict neighbors had children. If you can't control yourself, you really should have kids. Wouldn't you agree?
Tim Patrick: If you weren't such a pussy, Ian, you would leave them alone and come up to my apartment. Be a man. You want me? I'm standing right here.
Ian McFadden: (Laughing) Do you really think I'm that stupid, Tim? Here's what the situation is, you filthy Mick bastard. I came in through the fire escape and saw these kids here all alone. Their mother is passed out on the floor with a needle in her arm. I have their children in the room with me. One of them is just a baby, and she's sleeping soundly. The older one, he's around 8 or 9 years old. You know, Tim, you really should have never let the world know that you were abused as a child. When I got out of prison, one of my UVF partners gave me an entire box full of pro wrestling video tapes. Tapes that feature you. Tapes that highlight what Corey Casey held over your head for so long, that broke you. That sent you to therapy. That changed you. That nearly killed you. I know what happened to you, Paddy. And if you don't get down here, and come into this apartment soon, this child will meet the same fate. You know that old Irish rebel song that you fucks would sing in pubs?
Ian McFadden begins to sing in a low, creepy voice: “Some say the devil is dead, the devil is dead, the devil is dead, Some say the devil is dead and buried in Killarney. More say he rose again, more say he rose again, more say he rose again, And joined the British army.”
Ian McFadden: Well, Timmy-boy. I may not be the devil, and I never joined the British Army. But I'm pretty damn close. Think of me as the sick bastard that joined the UVF. And I'll do anything, and I mean anything, to see you face to face. I want to know what your blood smells and tastes like. And if I don't, this kid's sad, damaged future is on your head. You have 15 minutes to walk through into this room. Ta-Ta!
Tim drops the phone on the floor. A look of panic flashes across his face. He inhales and exhales very slowly to try and keep his composure and relax. He rushes over to the kitchen sink, splashes water in his face, screams into his hands and begins to shake. It's hard to imagine the emotion he's feeling. It's a mixture of the most intense fear and anger he's ever felt at one time. The look on his face is that of a rabid rottweiler. He rushes back into his bedroom and opens up his closet door and pulls out his gun, only to find that he only his one bullet left. Next, he picks up his baseball bat, that he has used in several matches and street fights. He changes into a black outfit, complete with flank jacket. He has never had to wear it in America, but he's glad he has it. The camera follows him as he walks out of his apartment, and down the hall. When he gets to the staircase, he stops and realized that Ian would probably be waiting for him at the door, so he goes back into his apartment and climbs out his window onto his fire escape. He waits for a minute or two, collecting his thoughts and comes up with a plan.
Tim Patrick's inner thoughts: Alright, Patrick, don't fuck this up. If I can see him from their window, I can get one shot off. If he's in another room, it's going to be tricky. I'll have to be silent and get behind him somehow. Tim slowly climbs down the fire escape and looks into the window. To his dismay, Ian has a knife to the child's throat, and is looking directly at him. There will be no surprises.
Ian McFadden: Drop the gun and come in the window, Tim. I left it open for ya. Did you really think I wouldn't be ready for your simple Irish ass? Tim Patrick's blood turns cold as he carefully climbs in the window to confront Ian. He left his gun on the fire escape, per Ian's demand, but what Ian doesn't know is that Tim still has his baseball bat tucked into his jacket. He walks up to Ian and in response, Ian moves the blade closer to the child's throat.
Ian McFadden: You know I'm not beneath hurting this kid.
The child is frozen in fear. Not moving, bug-eyed.
Tim Patrick: If you hurt him, I'll kill you where you stand. You haven't changed a bit, Ian. One would think that prison would change you, it hasn't.
Ian McFadden: I'm more like you than you'd like to think.
Tim Patrick: Wrong! I went out of my way not to target civilians in Belfast and Derry. I told my unit that if they went after anybody non-military that I would kill them myself. I meant it and they knew I meant it. Hell, Ian, I didn't even want to battle your boys in the UVF. But you kept coming after us. We had no choice. You loyalists are just as much of a victim in the North as anybody else. The British establishment has convinced you to fight for them, even though they had no issue putting you in prison. Where did you send you, Maghaberry? With the shit on the walls and the heat being left on during the summer? Did they even let you see a doctor or converse with your fellow prisoners? Did your cell have a window? I bet it didn't. I bet the Brits, who you so proudly support, made you fucking suffer just like they did to the Irish nationalist prisoners on the other wing of the prison! Didn't they?! Ian is totally distracted and stands there thinking if maybe Tim Patrick is telling the truth. Ian stands there, looking betrayed by life. Suddenly, the child makes a break for it by punching Ian in the balls. Ian drops the knife and hunches over in pain and the kid runs off. Tim quickly pulls out his baseball bat from the back of his jacket and steps on Ian's knife.
Ian McFadden: You wouldn't hesitate to break my skull, would you?
Tim Patrick: Nope...
Ian cracks a smile and pulls a gun out of his pants pocket, and points it at Tim's head.
Tim Patrick: Ian, you know this isn't the first time I've had a gun pointed at my head, and I'm not scared of death.
Ian McFadden: Tim, if I wanted to kill you tonight I would have done it already. You know that.
Tim Patrick: So how does this all end between us, Ian? Are we going to keep almost killing each other or is somebody going to take a dirt nap?
Ian McFadden: I'm going to walk out the door in a moment. I'm going to screw with you and slowly ruin your life at every chance I get. Until you kill me or I decide to kill you, you won't go a week without seeing me. I have a lot of money and many friends in America, and I have no problem finding places to stay.
Tim Patrick: So this will just go on and on? Your past was totally pointless, spending your entire life fighting for people who don't care, that use you. Now, your future will be spent following me around? What kind of life is this? Your last name is McFadden and you were born and lived in Belfast. Like it or not, you're Irish, not British. You're pointless, and if you ever try to harm another child just to “screw” with me, I'll kill you on the spot.
A loud knock is heard at the door ~~Knock Knock~~ POLICE, OPEN UP!
The camera zooms in on the police who bust open the door, Tim and Ian are nowhere to be seen. The window to the fire escape is wide open and the curtains are swaying from the wind.
~~The Scene Fades~~
February 17, 2013 Memphis, Tenn FedEx Forum Backstage 12:30 PM It's the day before Battle Grounds 67 and IWFWrestling.com's Ricky Rochester has been conducting interviews all day with questions that were sent in by fans with different IWF Wrestlers. The incident between Tim Patrick and Ian McFadden has been the talk of the IWF locker room and dirt-sheet websites for the last two days. Tim has just arrived in the building, and he's not in the best of moods. Rochester runs up to him with his microphone and camera crew.
Ricky Rochester: Mr. Patrick! Can we have some interview time? The internet has gone crazy over the past few days because of you.
Tim Patrick: Well, if it isn't my good friend, Stinky Douchenozzler. Anything for you, Stinky. What do you need?
Ricky Rochester: It's Ricky....nevermind. Look, here's the deal, Tim. All week, fans from all over the world have been sending in questions for us to ask you. Can we have 10-15 minutes of your time for this?
Tim Patrick: Sure thing, Douchenozzler.
Ricky Rochester: Alright, question 1. “Tim, can you tell us about your history with Ian McFadden?”
Tim Patrick: Well, when I'm not wrestling I try and spend my time honoring my ancestors by fighting for the freedom of the country they came from. I've made a lot of enemy’s and and Ian is one of them. We've had bar fights, gun fights. I shot him once, in the arm. Then he tried to blow up the bar I was in. My IRA unit sold him duds and then called the cops and told them there was a guy trying the blow the place up (laughing). So yeah, he's mad that I shot him and got him imprisoned. And I think he's even more mad not because of the fact that it was the Brits that he was trying to represent that betrayed him. Now, apparently, he's butt-hurt and mad at me over the whole thing. People like him need to realize that war is war and you can't take everything so personally. It will make you crazy. I know, I've been there. I remember the faces of every man I blew up or shot and he remembered the face of the man who shot him, me. And since I came back to America I've tried really hard to put all of that behind me and live a new and better life. I got together with Sean Libby and even though we've lost every match that we've had together since forming a team, we're getting better and I think we're going to win this week.
Ricky Rochester: Question 2. “Why didn't you call the police when that guy took the kid hostage? And have you heard anything from the neighbors since this happened?
Tim Patrick: I don't call 911, over anything, anymore. I've been through too much and I've seen too much to trust others to solve problems that I'm involved in. Do you know how long it would take for the cops to show up in South Philly? It could be up to an hour, no matter how awful the crime is. And when they got there, Ian could have just killed the kid. If somebody is gonna die because of this bullshit, it's gonna be him or me. I'm not going to let anybody else get hurt over it. Some city cop at 5 in the morning will never be as effective as an experienced guerrilla warfare paramilitary soldier/street-fighter like myself in any life or death situation. That's why I handled it myself. And no, I've had no contact with anybody in my building about what happened. I assume the cops were called because somebody heard what was happening. My apartment building is not a very close-knit community. Most are dirt poor, many are addicts. We don't talk to each other. There is an understanding that we all keep out of each others lives. I tend to follow that understanding until kids get involved. Then it's personal. Hopefully that kid can get out of that neighborhood and building before it it destroys him. It's perfect for me, because I like to stay by myself and live among people who have to fight to survive. It might be time to move though. Are there any questions about anything else?
Ricky Rochester: Yes, actually. Question 3. “Why do you think you and Sean have yet to win as a team?”
Tim Patrick: Good question. I'm not sure I have a good answer though. Sometimes I think we're having trouble molding into a team. We've both been successful as singles wrestlers but have limited experience in tag teams. I'm not making excuses, we should have won last week against Flex and Desmond, and before that against Hollywood's Fucking Finest. All I can say is that we're getting better and as long as I keep asking Jessica Matthews to change our matches into Hardcore bloodbaths instead of standard tags, she'll likely keep doing it. And everybody knows that nobody puts on a match with no rules like Sean and I.
Ricky Rochester: Alright, final question. “What are your long term goals with Sean Libby?”
Tim Patrick: We want to win the IWF Tag Team Championship. To do that, we have to start winning and make our mark in this company as a unit. It's fun to fight and get pops from the crowd and send everybody home talking about our matches the next day, but it's even more fun when you win. I haven't had any sort of wrestling title in years. It's been way too long and I've bled too much and have had too many broken bones to not be a champion in IWF. This is all going to change very soon for us, I'm sure of it. Our time is coming and every other duo in this company should take notice. Neart le Cheile is not a team that should be taken lightly, no matter what our win/loss record is. Tiocfaidh ár lá!
~~The Scene Fades~~
February 18, 2013 Memphis, Tenn FedEx Forum Backstage 6:00 PM
With just hours before Battle Grounds 67, Tim Patrick has been getting himself mentally ready to fight. He's been pacing around his locker room for the past few hours. He notices the cameraman and begins to speak.
Tim Patrick: Forget everything that has happened so far. Forget how Sean and I have lost in the past and forget Ian McFadden! Tonight, it begins again!
Johnny Cage, there isn't much I can say about you, brother. You have a lot of potential and a lot of guts, but it seems to me that you're just another rich guy from Hollywood. You claim to be hardcore, but really...how hardcore can somebody be when they're living in the Hollywood hills? You pride yourself in being a master in Karate, Jujitsu, and Jeet Kune Do. That's fine and damn impressive. However, you can scream “hi-ya” and do karate chops all day, it won't help you when I take a baseball bat to your head. You might have made an impact in UECW, but this is IWF, and I'm the most extreme son of a bitch that you've ever seen. And my boy Sean Libby is called crazy for a reason, and you're about to find out why.
That leads me to Farmer Dick. Now, to me, Farmer Dick sounds like a medical condition one gets after mowing the lawn with their pants off. Dickless, you're fun to watch. The fans love you. Hell, if I was out in the crowd I'd be singing and clapping along to “Thank God I'm a Country Boy”, too. But the fun and games end for me when I'm the one in the ring. We may be in Memphis this week, but there will be no Bluegrass music, no Elvis, no home cookin', and no southern hospitality. Tonight, you and Cage have stepped into a world of pain. Boys, you're about to find out that you'll never beat the Irish.
~”The Foggy Dew” begins to play~
~~The Scene Fades~~
Last edited by Tim Patrick on Sun Feb 17, 2013 11:52 pm; edited 1 time in total
Werner Wehrmact
Posts : 55 Join date : 2012-09-18 Age : 43 Location : Milwaukee, WI
Wrestler Stats IWF Record: 0-0-0 Alignment: Face
Subject: Re: Neart le Cheile [vs] Johnny Cage & Farmer Dick Sun Feb 17, 2013 10:40 pm
(I feel embarrassed by posting this so soon after finally getting better. It a non-emergency, but i HAVE to leave early to make some phone calls. Fall out from the weekend related. I WILL be ready for next week though.)
Scene cuts to Johnny Cage.
Cage: As promised, last Monday I did just what I promised I would do. I went out there and defeated Allen Walker and Blyss Lockheart. I earned my way into the Steel Cage Scramble. So in two weeks time, the one and only Johnny Cage will once again enter solid steel and capture yet another Championship to add to my already impressive collection. But first, I have one last match to fight before the festivities is to begin.
He grins.
Cage: In fact, it involves one of my opponents for the Scramble. I have to team with Farmer Dick to hand out yet another loss to the Tim Patrick and Sean Libby. And I will tell you this. I like our chances. With Farmer Dick's strength and my speed and technical wrestling, we will just be too much for those two to even have a chance.
Cage: However, do not get too comfortable with seeing us team. Because come Nowhere to Run I will remember none of it, when I have to defeat him for the Uprising title. Prepare Yourselves, Neart le Cheile. Yet another loss stands in front of you.
Farmer Dick
Posts : 16 Join date : 2013-01-20 Location : The Happy Dick Farm
Subject: Re: Neart le Cheile [vs] Johnny Cage & Farmer Dick Sun Feb 17, 2013 11:10 pm
|-|-| The scene opens with a shot of pure white. Nothing else can be seen on the scene accept for the bright color. After a moment the camera slowly begins to pan out until finally we can see that the white was coming from a white-colored Rooster. As the camera pans back more we can see the BRAND NEW Farmer Dick t-shirt debuted on the last episode of Insurgencies Battlegrounds. Holding it is a dorky looking teenager, with a big cheesy smile on his face. We pan back one last time to see Farmer Dick standing next to the kid, with a bigger smile on his face. |-|-|
Farmer Dick: Well golly! My very own shirt huh?! Well isn’t this just a hum-dinger! I love it. I should bring this shirt to everyone who competes at the biggest cock contest back home, because nobody can handle Tessy!
Kid: I don’t think that’s what it means…
Farmer Dick: Aww shucks what else could it mean foolish? Oh nevermind, I’ll take all of em that you got! I’m going to sell ‘em back home at the farm! Happy Dick Farm has been awful popular since I got this ugly mug on the Television machine.
|-|-| The Farmer pulls out a wad of cash, grabbing a milk crate of the t-shirts. He backs away and walks back down the hallway in the back of the IWF arena for this week. He opens up a small door, where we see an even smaller room. Inside the room we see nothing but three folding metal chairs, a small blue bench, and a small little make-shift rooster home, fenced in with what looks like a baby’s play-yard fencing. Farmer Dick sets the stack of shirts down and picks up Tessy who is roaming around the make-shift home. He looks at Tessy with a smile, and the bird pecks at his massive, nappy beard. |-|-|
Farmer Dick: Well Tessy, are you ready for this week? We got a whole new kinda ball game this week! Yes’n we do. This week we done got’s to go into a tag team match against Tim Patrick and Sean Libby. By jesum crow we’re going into a Tag Team match Tessy! Ain’t that excellent? Farmer Dick loves a new challenge, and this is definatly somethin’ different! We get to make a new friend too! Johnny Cage is gonna be the one helpin’ me put the boots to those two Irish fellas. Boy oh boy, this is gon’a be some awful fun. I like that Johnny Cage guy, I mean he’s a lil’ on the cocky side, but he’s got a good ol’ fashion work ethic that I can definatly get behind. And I’ll tell you one thing Tessy, we’re certainly going to bring the combat to them!
Now Tim and Sean seem to be formidable opponents. I mean one is as crazy as a loon, and the other is Tim Patrick. Haha-, but really, they’re both very unique individuals and it for sure makes it very hard to prepare for such a matchup. I’ve seen them wrestle, and they strike without notice like reptiles in the grass. Yes sirry, they are true strikers. I mean they’re both quick, so catching them will be like grabbing smoke. But we… we have some weapons on our side!
|-|-| Dick lets out that big smile and a nice old belly laugh as he adjusts the cock in his arms. |-|-|
Farmer Dick: Yes sir, we’re going to sting them like a scorpion. We’re going to rain down them punches. We’re going to be as vicious as a nightwolf. Yes Tessy, this team is going to be so cold, it’s going to be subzero in that arena. We are no mortal men, we are Johnny Cage and Farmer Dick!
|-|-| The farmer smiles and strokes his cock before returning him back to the floor. |-|-|
Farmer Dick: You know my daddy always told me Dick’s like to fight Tessy, and this Dick ain’t no different. If there’s anything I like more than poundin’ one fella, it’s poundin’ two! And that’s what I’m going to do on Battlegrounds. This Dick is gonna do some poundin’!
|-|-| Farmer Dick grabs his crate of shirts and holds it up with a big smile. The camera slowly fades with the shot of “You can’t handle the cock”. |-|-|
Sean Libby
Posts : 244 Join date : 2011-03-08 Age : 30 Location : Framingham
Wrestler Stats IWF Record: 3-4-0 Alignment: In Between
Subject: Re: Neart le Cheile [vs] Johnny Cage & Farmer Dick Sun Feb 17, 2013 11:53 pm
Walking in the streets of Framingham
-Scene opens up with Sean leaving a C.V. and walking towards his green car-
-Sean gets in his car and drives off-
Few minutes later
-Sean pulls up to a house and pulls into the drive way-
-Sean gets out of his car and rushes to the front door-
-Sean pounds on the door and rings the door bell-
???: Who is it?!
-The voice of Matt Bell comes from behind the door-
Sean Libby: Its me Matt! Open the door dude we need to talk bro!
Matt Bell: Nah I'm good dude. We don't need to talk.
Sean Libby: Come on bro I really need to talk with ya!
-Sean continues to pound on Matt's door with his fists, a bat, a tree branch, and even a jackhammer- O_O
-Sean begins to pant-
Sean Libby: Matt.... If your not going to open up, Imma get the old man from next door. Don't make me go get the old man from next door!
Old man: What?
Matt Bell: I'm not budging dude.
-Sean sighs and goes next door-
-Sean rings the neighbors door bell-
Old Man: Yes?
-A punching noise is heard as is a thumping-
-Sean grabs the knocked out old man's hand and drags him on the grass-
-When Sean gets to Matt's front door he picks up the old man like a bat-
Sean Libby: MATTY B!
-Inside the house Matt turns and looks out the window-
Sean Libby: I have a old man in my hands, and I'm not afraid to use him!
-After a brief silence smacking on the door with screams from the old man-
Old Man: AH! AHHH! MAKE HIM STOP! OW! STOP IT! AHHH!
-Matt rushes around his home as Sean keeps smacking the old man on the door-
Matt Bell: Alright! ALRIGHT!
-Matt opens the door and as he does, Sean tosses the old man to the bushes-
Sean Libby: Finally, can we talk-
Matt Bell: Here.
-Matt holds in his hand a replica of the IWF Uprising Title-
-Sean stares at it for about thirty seconds-
-Sean grabs his head and points at the title-
Sean Libby: KILL IT!!! KILL IT WITH FIRE!!!
-Sean screams and rushes to his car-
-Sean then opens his trunk and throws random objects like tools, soda boxes, pizza boxes, a bike, a chainsaw, another car, a Nyan cat, a Tim Patrick action figure and a Steel Angel action figure-
-Sean then finds a ax and gasoline and matches-
-Matt watches Sean with a face that turned to this o_o -_- O_O!!!-
-Matt throws the title down as Sean charges with the objects in his hand-
-Sean pours the gasoline on the title then lights a match and tosses it on the title then it gets engulfed in fire-
-Sean then ready's himself to smash the title with the ax-
Insert epic moment of killing a nonliving title here
-The scene reopens with Sean panting holding his ax-
Matt Bell:.... Is that what you came to do?
Sean Libby: No... I came to talk to you.
-Matt with a dull look on his face-
Matt Bell: Sean, all I have to say to you is, if you want to do anything in your life of wrestling? Do crazy shit like this dude. Even in the ring.
-Sean looks puzzled-
Sean Libby: Huh...Really?
-Matt looks at Sean then walks back in to his house without Sean-
-Sean carries the ax and walks to his car while thinking as the old man is seen crawling on the ground-
Sean Libby:.....YES!
-Sean throws the ax in the air-
-As it comes down the handle lands on the old man's head KOing him once again-
Sean Libby: Thanks guy, Wouldn't want blood on this, BUT YES! Matt is right... If me and my good friend Tim are going to make it to anyplace in this division, heh heh...Its time for us to go nuts! Time to uncork that bottle... LETS KICK SOME MAJOR BOOTY!
-Sean throws his ax in the backseat breaking his window-
-Sean then jumps into his car and drives off-
END
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Subject: Re: Neart le Cheile [vs] Johnny Cage & Farmer Dick
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