The Pride O'England Goin' Home Empty Handed.

Prologue: Stallone Moment...What A Way T'End A Match!!!

Ever seen a Rocky? Remember when Rocky and Creed knocked each other out? Remember when the white guy got up and got all the black people pissy?



WELL you saw it last week when James Shark got up before me. Yeah, the Donkey Kong of IWF managed to get up. Now before he goes running at the mouth? I want'em to know this, you were THIS...CLOSE...to getting your ass handed to ya mate. THIS...CLOSE...!!! So before you go hump another white woman, let's face the facts. If I were to face ya again? I'd smear your dark skin across th'fuckin' canvas. So...I wanted to address that before I went on to me opponent...what's the lad's name...?



Uh...Ian--Anus...Asshole...IAN...Blackfag...Blackwing YEAH! Ian Blackwing, that's the douche's name. Hey Ian, remember me? I'm th'fuckin' guy you and your little posse beat up two weeks back...! Yeah, didn't think you'd see me again did ya? WELL WELL WELL, looks like I get to have me some revenge against a British twat queef who's just bought himself a one way ticket through a wooden table! Now I know yer th'type o'person who's against this type o'shit; BUT WHAT CAN YA DO?!

Exactly...nothin', you set yourself up fer this one when ya decided it was a bright idea to attack me. See you Gentlemen bastards got it all wrong, we aren't th'problem...y'are. Yer the assholes who can't seem t'get it through yer heads that you don't run a company through intimidation...doesn't work lads...hate t'tell ya it so soon; But face facts, you picked a war ya can't win and now I gotta beat one of yer goons senseless...that don't sound too fun do it lad?

Naw, didn't think so, for now, I want ya to sit back, get comfy and enjoy yer'self it's a Pay-Per-View for crying outloud!!! OH, and before I forget....Shark...if y'think it was a close win?



Meh...sure why th'fuck not...

DONKEY COON FTW!!!



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Connor O'Shannon:

Well i stumbled in at 2 am all drunk and full of smoke
My wife said "I have had enough, that's it i'm sick,get out"
So i stumbled down to kellys pub across the edge of town
And told the boys me story, and we had another round...

The camera slowly started to come towards th'sound o'water. It opens up- a door...

Connor O'Shannon:


Now we drink
And drink
And drink
And drink
And drink
And drink
And fight
Yes we drink!

The camera shows a curtain...

Connor O'Shannon:

And drink
And drink
And drink
And drink
And drink
And fight
And if i might see a pretty girl i'll sleep with her tonight
Yes we drink!
And drink
And drink
And drink
And drink
And drink
And fight==

The curtain jerks and it shows me...nude...I jump and look at the cameraman with a disgusted glare.

Connor O'Shannon: What in the name of all that's fuckin' holy do y'think yer doin'?!?!?!

Cameraman: Sorry...! Uh, we heard water and--

Connor O'Shannon: You thought it was a good idea to try and peek on me huh? Tryin' t'see if Ol'Connor's backin' a 12 gauge in his pants huh?! I didn't know you were curious mate!

Cameraman: What?! No! I wanted to know where you were, you said you'd talk to us...!

Connor O'Shannon: About...?

Cameraman: Your match against Ian Blackwing for your IWF High Impact Championship...?

Connor O'Shannon: Oh you mean my Irish rose o'a title?! What about that pussball Blackwing?

Cameraman: Do you feel like you're up against a challenge?

Connor O'Shannon: ...

I sigh and turn the water off wiping me face off.

Connor O'Shannon: Gimme a minute will ya?

Cameraman: Oh, yeah...sorry.

After ten minutes I come out in a black T-shirt and blue jeans along with black Adidas shoes. I sit down on the hotel bed and look at the cameraman.

Connor O'Shannon: What can I do y'fer?

Cameraman: So...you have a Tables Match against Ian Blackwing for your High Impact Championship. Do you think that Ian and the RHG are one step closer to reclaiming all of the titles in IWF?--

Connor O'Shannon: Lemme stop ya right there...what th'fuck are you talkin' about? These Rightful Whores ain't takin' nothin' from th'good ol'folks of IWF...I can assure y'that. I mean, people don't work hard around here just so they can get it taken away by a bunch of funny talking bastards who live on th'other side o'th'pond! No, they aren't going to come and take away me belt I worked hard fer. I don't see me'self gettin' it taken away tonight, because it seems Ian's been a quiet bastard...which is never good.

Last week, ya saw me up against that big black clusterfuck Shark, and he got me with a lucky punch. I can safely say, I knocked him on his illiterate ass. Next time, I'm gonna get me revenge. But it was a good match, can't lie about that. But IAN...if you don't give me th'match I've been beggin' fer at Bloody Sunday, I'm gonna wedge my right foot up yer ass and use my left to knock on your asscheek askin' if th'right can come out and play!

This isn't a game lad....and it sure as Hell ain't somethin' you can play off. No, tonight yer facin' a champion, a man who's goin' to put ya in yer place...just like I'm going to do to the other British pieces o'shit who wanted to fuck with me two weeks ago...! So no, th'belts aren't goin' anywhere unless Corey FUCKIN' Casey doesn't dick around and lose to Brandon MacDonald....here's to hopin'...

I reach over the dresser near me and pull up a bottle o'beer. I swig it some and raise my bottle letting out a sigh.

Cameraman: So you're prepared for Bloody Sunday.

Connor O'Shannon: DUH, you haven't been payin' attention have ya lad? Boy oh boy...Chuck knows how t'pick'em. Look can ya do me a favor and give me a moment o'peace? I want t'try and get my head straight...or more than likely get a little buzzed before me match.

Cameraman: Uh, sure, yeah...go ahead.

I stop him, pulling him by the arm.

Connor O'Shannon: And another thing: Ever walk in while I'm washin' me balls...I'm going to have yours with a side of black puddin'...we clear?

Cameraman: ...

The camera pans down t'th'cameraman's crotch. He nods his head and walks off, I shake me head and smirk.

Connor O'Shannon: I love fuckin' with workers...

I laugh and chug me beer down...

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Ian Me Boy...You Dun Goofed...

IAN ME LAD...given the circumstance, I'm gonna be blunt with ya: Yer gonna be gettin' your balls handed to ya. Sorry to say it BUT it's true mate. Let's be honest, did you think you have a chance? I mean...come on boyo, yer not gonna expect me t'just HAND the belt over did ya?! That'd be horrible!

REALLY HORRIBLE!

Because that'd mean we wouldn't be givin' the folks in Canada a show. That's right, I want this to be a good match; But that doesn't mean I'm gonna carry ya through it. You're use to leanin' on the others...I get it...you're a small little baby deer tryin' to find his legs. Sadly enough you had to find them against me. So I'll tell ya what, when I put ya through a table, don't feel bad.

I mean, you had your chance and blew it. And to make matters worse, the RHG are gonna look at you butthurt at the fact ya couldn't take on lil'ol'me. The Irish Bastard who can't say his "the"'s and "to"s right. That's gotta hurt ya a lil done'it? But truly Blackwing...I'm gonna hurt ya. I'm going to make you see--no FEEL the pain you put me through two weeks back.

I want ya to know this was an ass kickin' waitin' to happen, I just didn't think it would happen so soon. SO LAD, make sure you have a good few hours of peace before I come and knock your ass out and make you me personal bitch.

Payback's A Bitch With Red Hair.

Fade. Static. End.