Julian Jacobs [vs.] Bobby O'Day

July 4th
The Palmer Center, Easton, PA
Backstage at IWF Underground
Off camera

I got to admit. I am pretty satisfied with myself right now I have to say so myself. It is not that I ever doubted that I was going to walk out of that ring victorious, it is more the feeling getting proving two Buttheads wrong that clearly thought that they stood a chance in this one. Proving to them and all the fans that it was all about Bobby O'Day! Come to think of it. They booed me. Why did they do that? They shouldn't boo me! Why do they not love me?

???
Are those tears on your cheeks?

What? Who there?

Bobby O'Day
NOOOOO!!!!

Ok wow, Alison? Is that a baby in her arms? Is it mine? If she tells me it is mine I am going to die.

Alison Williams.
Jesus Christ, you still scream like a little girl!

Bobby O'Day.
DO NOT!!!

Alison Williams.
Ugh.. that screams rapes ears. Claire can't even hit such a high pitch.

And just like that an ear ripping scream engulfs the entire room.

Alison Williams.
And now you woke her up! Good going Bobby... ssshh.. relax baby.. mommy's here..

As Alison walks off trying to calm Claire to sleep again I can't help but think what if it is mine. Megan has a kid. I can't even stay in the same room as it before I get a panic attack. And that little soft spot on it's head? It takes all of the self control I have not to touch it. Oh god...

Alison Williams.
There. She stopped crying. That scream of your's really is something Bobby. She usually never cries. My badass little princess.

I can't help but to stare at Claire. Oh my god.. what if she really is mine.

Alison Williams.
Bobby, you impressed me out there!

I am not ready to be a father.

Alison Williams.
You are still just as strong as I remember.

My life is over.

Alison Williams.
Bobby, would you please stop staring at my tits. I know they are fantastic, but please stop.

And to think that just earlier I was so happy.

Alison Williams.
Bobby?

Alison moves Claire around a bit and my eyes follow her like a hawk.

Alison Williams.
Oh.

I probably have to quit wrestling now so I can raise her. And I just got off to a great start. Why did this witch have to show up again? She always ruins everything.

Alison Williams
Do you want to hold her?

I am going to do my best. I am going to take responsebility like a man. Claire is going to be so proud of her daddy. I may not be ready for this but I am going to do my damn hardest and destroy every Butthead that wants to harm her! I'll be her hero..

Bobby O'Day
I'll be the best father ever.

Did I just say that out loud?!

Alison Williams.
What!?!?

Bobby O'Day
I'll raise her better than anyone else!

I have never actually seen such confusion as I see on Alison's face.

Alison Williams
Excuse me?

Bobby O'Day
What?

Alison Williams
She is not your's Butthead!

The feeling of relief is almost orgasmic.

Bobby O'Day.
Phew.. dodged that bullet.

Alison Williams.
You really thought she was your's?

Bobby O'Day
You never know!

Alison Williams.
It doesn't even make sense Bobby. It is like 5-6 years since we dated. There is no chance she is your's. Jesus...

Bobby O'Day
You scared the life out of me! Never do that again.

Alison Williams
You only got scared because you are a Butthead.

Alison laughs.

Alison Williams.
I can't believe you thought she was your's.

Bobby O'Day
Who is the father?

Alison falls silent and looks away.

Bobby O'Day
You are not gonna tell me?

She just rolls her eyes.

Alison Williams
...Its Brenton

What!?!?

Bobby O'Day
That Butthead is not being faithful to my sister!??! I am going kick his ass!!! Again!!!

Alison laughs.

Alison Williams
It is amazing how slow you are. But anyways. You did good today. Even though those other guys sucked something hard, you still did good. But you can be so much better. You need a good manager.

Bobby O'Day
So who do you suggest? Megan?

Alison just looks at me.

Alison Williams
I am sure that Megan would do great. Not so much Kim though.. Kim wouldn't do good at all. Ugh.. I hate that bitch.

She called Kim a bitch! I form my fist into a ball. Wait.. I can't hit Alison..

Alison Williams
You need me at ringside! Can you even begin to imagine how much we would dominate? I am by far the best manager in the world. No one even gets close to my status! There is a reason why I am a goddess you know!

Bobby O'Day
But why?

Alison Williams
Because I love you, Butthead!

She says with a smile. She loves me? I... I don't know what to think about that.

Bobby O'Day
Thank you?

I don't know what the right response is but that one was wrong...

Alison Williams.
You're welcome.

She smiles as she picks up her phone as it starts to ring.

Alison Williams
Can you hold Claire while I take this?

She hands me the baby and all I think about is that little soft spot on her head. Must... not... touch... it...

Bobby O'Day
Say Bobby. Booobby.

She just laughs. I guess it is not gonna happen. Stupid baby... Good thing she is not my daughter. Way to stupid to be mine. Bobby! It is like the easiest word in the world! Suddenly I hear a click. That sound an iphone makes when it snaps a picture.

Alison Williams.
Look at you two. So cute. You look good with a baby in your arms. Take a single walk down hallway with her and I promise you, you will not be a single man when you come back to this locker room. I am going to save this picture.

I laugh.

Bobby O'Day
I don't need a baby to get laid. Just take a single look at this body and everyone wants Bobby! You cannot deny that. Who was on the phone by the way?

Alison laughs.

Alison Williams.
Its true. I can't. It was my boyfriend. He just wanted to know when he should pick me and Claire up.

Bobby O'Day.
Oh.. your boyfriend...

That Butthead...

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

July 6th
Sacremento, California.
The O'Day Household

Taylor O'Day
Oh my fucking god! BOBBY!!!

And that woke up the entire neighborhood.

Bobby O'Day
What?

Taylor O'Day
Why do you have to keep appearing in my magazines? Do you even realize how traumatizing it is to see your own brother in these kind of magazines?

Bobby O'Day
You shouldn't be reading that stuff anyways!

Taylor O'Day
Pffft.. as if I read it. So many hot guys in here! ….and you of course. Ugh! You ruin it all!

Bobby O'Day
You are just jealous that I am way better model than you.

Taylor O'Day
Nuh uh!

Bobby O'Day
When was your last photoshoot?

Taylor O'Day
I am a better wrestler than you.

Bobby O'Day
Not for long.

Taylor O'Day
Get out!

Bobby O'Day
This is my room

Taylor O'Day
I don't care! Get out

I just laugh.

Bobby O'Day
See ya little sis!

I get up and leave. I walk downstairs and into the livingroom. Megan is sitting on the couch with her son, my nephew. The TV is on. Replays from Underground are on and coincidently my match is on. I take a seat next to Megan and watch.

Megan O'Day
I am impressive. I knew you would do good.

Bobby O'Day.
Yeah, it was alright.

Megan O'Day
You are completely manhandling them. They never even stood a chance.

Bobby O'Day
Those Buttheads were easy! Easier than Taylor on a Saturday night!

Megan O'Day
She is your sister!

Bobby O'Day
It is true though.

Megan O'Day
...Yeah

Milton O'Day
That was your first mistake, right there. Notice how you slammed him down to the mat and did not go straight for the pin? You could have won that match so much faster than you did. You should also get some real wrestling gear. What you are wearing is way to tight. You have to wear proper gear to be at your best.

Megan O'Day
Stop it dad! Bobby did great!

That's my dad. Never approving of me. I think he was the most disappointed when I turned to modeling. For him three daughters that were great at wrestling wasn't good enough. I think he would trade it all in if he could just get one son that was great at wrestling. My dad started the O'Day Legacy. He was the first O'Day and now my sisters kept the name alive. These days the O'Day name is associated with women's wrestling and my dad is not satisfied with that. Of course, he is proud of his daughters but it was just not enough for him. I think I disappointed him.

Milton O'Day
Why did you pin the weakest one? That is some Jason Hawk shit.

Oh yeah, my dad hates Jason in the ring. Loves him out of the ring.

Milton O'Day
I pick out the strongest one, and you take him down and you humiliate him! That's how you earn the respect! Do that and you deserve the respect!

I don't want to answer. The real reason why I got into wrestling was because I wanted to impress my dad. I want his approval. I want him to tell me that I am good enough. I want to live up to the family name. I want to be a real O'Day. We keep watching the match and it starts nearing the end.

Megan O'Day
Ouuuuh! He bite me!

I can't help but laugh. Megan punches my arm.

Megan O'Day
Not funny!

I just smirk and watch the TV again. On the TV we can see me hit the Good Night! Sleep Tight! And the match is over.

Bobby O'Day
See that dad. I won

My dad just looks at me.

Milton O'Day
You need more than a fancy finisher to impress me.

He then gets up and leaves. He still doesn't approve of me...

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-
Bobby O'Day vs Julian Jacobs
On Camera

So who is Julian Jacobs? I'll tell you who Julian Jacobs is. Julian Jacobs is what happens when your reletives fuck each other for several generations!

The perfect recipe for a Butthead!

Mr. Double-J is a special kind of Butthead! He is that kind that I am going to destroy in no time! It will be so easy to destroy him because his body is made out of pussy! I know all about destroying pussy! His body is made out of pussy so he can go fuck himself all he wants! But hey! Isn't that some kind of rape?`You can be damn sure that Juliboy is going to report me for rape after the match!

But what the fuck! What can I do about it? It is not my fault his body is made out pussy!

But moving on! This Butthead is irrelevant! I need bigger, badder and better opponents! This is a disgrace! I should be way higher up on the card! Chris Cryptic? Noah Marshall? Dean Vandal? Who the fuck is that? Why are they main eventing? These Buttheads got nothing on Bobby O'Day! Bobby O'Day brings the real deal all day every day! I can tell you right now that Noah Marshall is gonna choke sooner rather than later. Dean Vandal is going to lose to that Butthead Task and Christ Cryptic might get a decent run in this tournament.

And they all get to be higher on the card than me?

Me! An O'Day! A man with my legacy deserves to main event! But no instead these Buttheads with no future ahead of them get push me to the back of the line! Hey IWF! Get your head out of your ass and recognize the real talent you have around. For if you don't it will leave!

I had way too many offers coming my way to rot up here in the undercard! But it is OK! When I destroy this Butthead IWF better recognize! Because I can assure you all that Bobby is going 2-0 and gets one step closer to that UG title.

It is only a matter of time before it is mine!

Don't doubt for a second that I am walking out of this tournament with the title. Throw every single Butthead you got at me! Dean Vandal, Jay Hot Stuff, Chris Cryptic! Bring them all! I am taking them all down. I'll take them all down at the same time if I have to!

But first I have knock this Double J Butthead down!